False Summit Club & 107 miles of the Superior Hiking Trail

Map depicting the Captains’ journey, more or less as it happened
19.2Jackson Creekstarted hiking after 4pm at 270 Degree Overlook; bear bag hanging difficulties that continued throughout hike; heard wolves at night
213.2Hazel Camptook delightful two-hour break at S. Carlson Pond; heard wolves at night
321.2Kimball Creekfollowed moose tracks in light morning rain; arrived at Magney State Park in full sun; cleaned and dried everything; walked along Lake Superior!; swam a little and filtered and drank Superior water
412.6 Grand Marais Campground & Marinaarrived in Grand Marais during the Arts Festival; resupplied and got Subway for lunch; bought new socks; very luckily got a spot at campground
519.3 Indian Camp Creekgot breakfast sandwiches at Holiday gas station on walk out of town; 2 mile road walk to trail; walked over a large beaver pond (no beavers sighted)
615.8 Mystery Mountain campsitearrived at Lutsen ski area; found drinking fountains and empty deck to dry tents out and make lunch; ate a pivotal plate of nachos at ski resort bar; got caught in slammer
716.6 Temperance River State Parkwalked up Carlton Peak with very pretty views of Lake Superior; reached 107-mile terminus at Temperance; ranger at State Park put a lot of effort into helping us get a wonderful camping spot right above the lake even though all sites were reserved through the summer
Chart showing mileage and interesting facts of the Captains’ partial thru-hike

“Eighty percent seems good enough.”


We, the Captains, sat eating nachos in a nearly empty ski lodge in northern Minnesota in July of 2019. Dark wood paneling covered the floor and walls, and carved bears holding signs that said things like “Get Lost” and “Gone Fishin'” stood guard in the corners. I eyed the growing grey clouds out the window while the bartender let us know there was a 400 — “probably even 500!” — pound bear in the area that recently and often helped itself to snacks from the restaurant’s bear-proof trashcans. A few seats down the only other patron in the restaurant, clearly quite a few drinks in, informed us that a bad storm was imminent and we had better not venture back into the woods just yet. “It’s going to be a slammer,” he predicted solemnly and maybe with a touch of schadenfreude, first to us and then once or twice more to his Heineken.

For me there are two variables of nature that feel particularly sinister: bears and lightning. Bears only sometimes, and I can normally logic my way out of the fear. Lightning, inordinately, and the faintest whiff of it sets a course of panicked adrenaline through my veins.

Captain Math paid for the nachos and we headed out. “I can do this!” I said to myself. “It’s an adventure, it might not rain, it might not lightning, it might not thunder, bears aren’t real, I can do this IcandothisIcandothisIcandothis.” It was an unhinged mantra, muttered without any conviction and dissolved without a fight by the first drops of rain.

It was a bona fide storm we found ourselves in, with real torrents of rain and real lightning and thunder. It was, indeed, the slammer that the barfly soothsayer had warned about. The sky darkened as though the sun had set and it made sense to wait it out before walking over Mystery Mountain, but there was no real danger, no call for real alarm or panic. But sometimes alarm and panic don’t need a real threat; they’re happy to settle in given the slightest opportunity.

At my behest, the other two Captains gamely agreed to turn back a mile or so to set up an early camp at a slightly lower elevation. The storm, and my anxiety with it, eased up, and after a relaxing evening of reading and a sound night’s sleep, we woke up around 6:00, made small talk with two other hikers who had waited out the storm in the same meadow, and walked 16.6 miles to Temperance River State Park. It was a hot and sunny day, with rare views of Lake Superior and all the Captains were in good spirits. After seven days of hiking, blisters were on the mend and aching muscles, though not becoming less sore, were starting to feel more normal. As we filled our bottles at a spigot inside the park I announced, 160 miles short of our goal, that perhaps it was time to call it a day on the trek.

Where it all began

It’s hard to tell why exactly I decided I was done with the hike. I had been eagerly planning it for six months, and I had felt excited to test my mettle on a relatively short and tame trail, with loftier hiking goals in mind. Perhaps it was the fateful plateful of nachos in Lutsen. If we hadn’t stopped for a nibble, I wouldn’t have been intimidated by the storm crawling across the horizon while the bartender spun his tall tales and the tippler offered his ominous counsel. Maybe the thunder-and-lightning spell of anxiety carried over into the next day and made me doubt that I actually wanted to be on the trail, when I had an apartment to pack and a big move to accomplish shortly after completing the hike.

Whatever the reason, it’s been quite proven in my life that quitting comes naturally to me. In fact, I’m a card-carrying member of the False Summit Club, whose philosophy is that sometimes reaching a false peak — literally on a mountain as well as metaphorically in other realms of life — is at least good enough, and often is preferable to making it to an actual summit. I discovered the joy of the FSC on a hike with my big sister, Amy, the summer I was 15. One and a half miles from the top of Longs Peak in Rocky Mountain National Park we decided that we’d had enough of walking in the dark over sharp rocks and along endless switchbacks. We stopped at the Boulder Field, shivered, ate an apple, and turned around, no worse off for having not reached the summit and glad to be out of the cold and thin air.

Fifteen years later, I’m happy to not give a situation one more go, a run one more mile, a job one more month. I’ve quit countless jobs (once I put in a two hour’s notice so I could go on a picnic), have been relieved on many occasions when plans fell through so I could stay home and read, and often consider cancelling trips right before I travel because it’s just easier not to go.

Yet, a year after bailing early from the Superior Hiking Trail, I feel a little disappointed about being so skillful at quitting. In the moment, I had felt so sure that leaving the hike was the exact right thing to do. I didn’t anguish over the decision. It cropped up in my mind, I perfunctorily considered it this way and that way for a few miles of walking, and from where I stood, there really was no other option. Only after I had made up my mind did I consult with the other Captains, not even considering how my new plan would affect them. They were kind and thoughtful about the choice, and showed admirable empathy and understanding, even when I couldn’t quite understand it myself.

Even as a truncated trek, it was still a highlight in a year full of highlights. The adventure started in Duluth in Harriet Quarles’s 15-passenger van. Harriet, a septuagenarian with pink hair and a penchant for Parliaments, runs a shuttle service along the Superior Hiking Trail, and drives in a slapdash fashion, cell phone in one hand, cigarette in another, a cursory turn on the steering wheel every now and again. By the time we had reached the trailhead I was completely enamored by her wild stories as well as had a splitting headache, and Captain Watch was surprised we had made it at all. Shakily, we tumbled from her van, walked a mile uphill in a light drizzle to the official northern terminus of the SHT, waved to Canada in the near distance, and turned back downhill to begin our journey. From there I got to spend seven days walking in the woods with two of my favorite people.

We followed moose tracks and walked over beaver dams. We heard wolves in the middle of the night and on the second night I convinced myself there was a dog in our camp so that I didn’t need to worry about the wolves. The dog had spirited away by morning, but I had slept better for its imagined presence. I swam in and drank from Lake Superior. I finally understood how handy hiking poles are. I got better at filtering water, learned (and have forgotten) how to tie knots and hang a bear bag, got more tolerant of bugs and proudly grew my biggest blisters yet. One evening we played a game of chess at a scenic campsite near a murmuring river. Another evening we feasted on sophisticated Mountain House meals my sister Laura had sent us. I learned that 2.5 days in the woods is enough for me to start to feel nostalgic for solid walls, electrical outlets and running water.

I vacillate between calling the hike a “failed thru-hike” and a “partial thru-hike.” In the last 12 months, I’ve generally preferred the latter. It has a delightful oxymoronic ring to it, doesn’t feel quite as defeatist, and nicely obfuscates the missing 160 miles. But lately I’m beginning to favor the former. I like its frankness. It makes clear that a thru-hike was not hiked all the way through. It lifts its chin high, unabashed that the goal was abandoned, the metaphorical summit left unclimbed. And it reminds me that, really for the first time in my life, I’m not quite satisfied with an ambition’s early terminus.

The False Summit Club in all its unconcerned, low-key glory is a valuable mindset to have. It can prevent you from being miserable in any number of situations, from not wasting time on a book you never will enjoy to not staying in a relationship past its expiration date. But I wish that I had made myself hike at least one more day, say another 20 miles, to give myself a chance to change my mind. I wish I had let the other Captains have more of a say; it was their hike, too, after all. Superstar climber Alex Honnold has said, “Nobody achieves anything great by being happy and cozy.” This is, more or less, the antithesis of how I live my life. I am unconcerned with “achieving anything great” (whatever that means), and tend towards coziness and comfort as much as possible. However, I’ve learned from this hike that my first impulse might not always be right. Perhaps—but only perhaps, because I still believe in quitting—it can be worthwhile to be uncomfortable for one extra day, just to see how you really feel.

End of the line: Temperance River State Park

Leaving Shanghai

Early in the evening of February 3rd, Josh and I stood beside Beijing Road, our bags in a pile on the sidewalk. It felt like a late spring afternoon with sunlight filtering through the trees. The street was almost completely empty and you could hear birds singing, a rare sound in this city of 24 million. Somewhere above us arpeggios from a trumpet floated out an open window as we waited for the Didi we had ordered to take us to Pudong International Airport.

Four days earlier, neither of us felt sure whether we wanted to stay in China and wait out the virus, or call it a day and say zàijiàn to Shanghai. We had spent almost two weeks inside our apartment, with trips to the Star Market around the corner and walks in the nearby sculpture park our only outings, with the occasional short run when the air quality permitted. The combined effects of the coronavirus and the Chinese New Year left most public places closed, and even though some restaurants and coffee shops did stay open, we agreed it was better not to spend too much time out and about. You know, just in case.

So we spent our days reading, watching Netflix, watching movies, watching YouTube, doing YouTube yoga, and cooking Brussel sprouts and pasta. Which isn’t a terrible routine, really. But we didn’t know when schools were going to start up again (at the earliest it would’ve been February 29), and, although I’m the very definition of a homebody, I felt restless and antsy. However, there was still a lot that we liked about Shanghai, and we were about to start new jobs teaching literature, with good pay and four-day weekends so we would’ve had a lot of opportunities for exploring China. It was hard to tell what the best thing to do was.

Then the front entrance to our neighborhood was closed and we could only enter and exit through the back gate, and we had to sign in and out (which proved quite challenging since our already-limited Mandarin was fading as weeks without lessons slipped by). Then the sculpture park, our one truly enjoyable outing, shut its gates for an unspecified time. Then the U.S. Department of State raised its travel warning to China from level two (“exercise increased caution”), to level three (“reconsider travel”), to four, the highest level (“do not travel”), with the advice that “those currently in China should attempt to depart by commercial means.” So we booked a flight to Denver, and it was cancelled twenty minutes later.

I don’t think that we were in any danger of getting the virus. A very small number of cases were confirmed in Shanghai, and we were cloistered in our corona-free apartment. But all the things that I liked about Shanghai were temporarily on hold. Exploring the city by subway, finding new restaurants, going to museums, reading at my favorite coffee shop, having Mandarin lessons, planning trips to other provinces—these were all on pause for the moment and it was hard to tell (is still hard to tell) when all of that could resume. So when the flight to Denver was cancelled, well, that made me feel like I’d rather not wait around for all flights to be postponed indefinitely.

With most flights to America either suspended or prohibitively expensive, we decided to head west, to the land of milk, honey and windmills. We booked a flight to the Netherlands on Friday, refreshing the airline’s website constantly throughout Saturday and Sunday, our breath bated, half expecting another cancellation. And on Monday, we left China.

Sitting in the back of a minivan on the way to the airport, we rode through the city in the gloaming. Unlike most of the underground traveling we did around Shanghai, this last ride gave us a chance to see the city. Not in its entirety, of course, but in larger swaths than how we usually got to see it. We could look behind us and there was the Oriental Pearl and the Shanghai Tower and that one building that looks like the Eye of Sauron at night.

It felt weird to be leaving just three days after making the decision, and sad, too. But at the same time I have never felt so relieved for a flight to board on time, so grateful for the crew who already have what sounds like the most exhausting job, now flying in and out of a country nervous with a novel sickness. After two temperature screenings at the Shanghai airport and one during a layover in Abu Dhabi, and after wearing face masks for over 24 hours, we exited the Schiphol airport in Amsterdam and breathed in the windy, crisp Dutch air.

Things that I like(d), pt. 2

(I drafted this weeks ago and never got around to posting it. Even though I’m not in China anymore, I still like these things.)

A delightful trip to Huangshan (Yellow Mountains)!

We rode the train from Shanghai to Tunxi, in the Anhui province. From there a bus took us to the town of Tangkou. We bought cherries and a mango from a fruit seller, and walked to the cozy hostel/hotel Zero Five One Seven Inn, where we had a delightful stay. The folks there made us breakfast in the morning and helped plot out a hiking itinerary for us.

It’s hard to describe how beautiful Huangshan is. The day we were there it was icy and crisp and granite peaks stretched so far into the distance. At first I was grumpy with the big groups of people and accompanying loudspeakers, but, like anywhere touristy, a little extra walking will take you far from the madding crowd. Before we completely left the tourists, we had a really pleasant interaction with a woman selling postcards from a wooden kiosk. With our very limited Chinese we talked about how lovely it all was. Normally people couldn’t understand us when we attempted to speak in Mandarin, but she was very patient and encouraging, asking us where we lived and what we were doing in China. It was a brief conversation, maybe lasting a minute, but left a warm and lasting impression.

Coffee breaks along the Bund!

A few weeks ago it was a sunny, fresh-air day and we set off on a walk in no particular direction. We ended up at the Bund, where we sat, drank a Family Mart coffee, read a little, and watched people. The city looked good and the air felt good. It was one of those days that feel like school is out and everything is a possibility.


Every park I entered in Shanghai was so lovely. Some were full of people walking, playing badminton, dancing, and practicing musical instruments, while others were quiet and seemed far removed from the churn of the megacity.

There was a park by my job that I loved. I always made a point of walking around it at least once before going into work, and liked to bring a tray of fruit and a book there during lunch. Often there would be groups of musicians playing together, flutes or saxophones, trumpets or clarinets, and stringed instruments I couldn’t recognize. On one rainy day, a musician set up two big umbrellas over his synthesizer and sheet music and played away, safe from the constant drizzle.

My favorite part of the park, of all the parks, were the cats. There were at least a dozen cats that lived in this one park and they seemed well-taken care of and content as only cats can be content. One morning I saw an old man tearing newspapers into small sections and periodically placing them on the ground. Then he bent over each little newspaper plate and filled it with rice and kibbles for all the park cats.

Shanghai: week 19

Don’t drink the water, don’t you breathe the air.

Modest Mouse

I’m not actively worried about contracting the coronavirus. Chances are that I won’t come in contact with it and even if I were to get it, I would be fine. But it is a weird time. I got a bad cold a week ago, which took the wind right out of my sails, and then the air got really rotten, and then it kept drizzling a stupid grey drizzle that just made things wet but didn’t freshen things up, and then the sun stopped shining (for good, it seems).

I’m off work because of the Chinese New Year and the air has finally cleared up quite a bit, but I feel a little shy about going to any public spaces because what if someone coughs on me and that’s it? And many places are closed for the new year, anyway. Today, when Josh and I finally mustered up the fortitude to walk to one of our favorite restaurants for lunch, we found it closed. It was an almost eerie walk—normally a bustling street, it was nearly empty and the few people we did come across were all wearing masks. I know it was quiet because people are ringing in the new year in their hometowns, but it’s easy to imagine a post-apocalyptic scenario where a virus breaks out and all the stores sell out of masks and you aren’t supposed to go outside because there are zombies that carry the virus and if you aren’t wearing a mask then you’ll get eaten and you’ll get the virus.

I like living in China, I do, I even have posts dedicated to how much I like it, but sometimes I shake my fist at the country at large and shout: “BE DIFFERENT!” I want to turn on the faucet and be able to drink the water and I want to check my air quality app every morning and think, “Oh yes, of course it’s a good air day and I can go running whenever I want to.” I know I’m being a little unreasonable, but sometimes I even want the language to be different. Maybe just two tones instead of five, how’s about?

I love you, China, but I’m going to go have a sandwich and watch The Office now. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Service center no. 4

I live on the west side of the Huangpu river, where there are all the coffee shops, restaurants, malls, cars and scooters you could hope for. Sometimes it is nice to cross to the other side of the water, where there is a 45 km foot-and-bike path and where, even if it isn’t actually, the air feels fresher. This time of year there are marigolds along the path and some of the trees still have their leaves.

A few weeks ago, Josh and I took the line 2 subway (which I like to complain about because it’s always crowded and I’m a grump about sharing space on the subway) under the river, and got bikes from the ubiquitous bike-share program Hellobike. Armed with a baguette, some pastries that are like madeleines but aren’t, and a thermos of instant coffee, we leisurely biked in the very autumnal air. (The only speed of biking I know how to do is leisurely. Sometimes I think I might just tip over sideways, I go so slow.) We saw a big bridge, biked alongside barges lumbering down the river, and heard a saxophone coming from some hidden park.

We noticed buildings every once in a while that looked like little cafes, with signs that said Service Center, and each had a number. Heading home we stopped at one and it was the most pleasant discovery. A big room with big windows looking over the river. Tables and chairs, a sofa, and a counter with stools along one of the windows, bookshelves with books for borrowing, and an electric tea kettle for heating hot water. It was basically the coziest coffee shop I’ve been in, only you don’t go to buy anything (you can bring your own food and drink, and there is drinking water available); you simply go to have a space to be.

Josh and I settled in with our treats, coffee and books. The winter sun came warm and low into Service Center 4. Some people typed away at laptops, others read, and three older men sat around a table, emphatically discussing (something), drinking tea and peeling oranges.

Bye, 2019!

Thanks for all the reading time!


– Harry Potter y la orden del fénix by J.K. Rowling (author), Alicia Dellepiane, Gemma Rovira Ortega (translators)
– The Emissary by Yoko Tawada (author), Margaret Mitsutani (translator)
– Washington Black by Esi Edugyan
– Death and the Penguin by Andrey Kurkov (author), George Bird (translator)
– The Friend by Sigrid Nunez


– The Library book by Susan Orlean
– La familia de Pascual Duarte by Camilo José Cela
– Authority by Jeff VanderMeer


– Eloquent Rage by Brittney Cooper
– The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy
– A History of the World in Six Glasses by Tom Standage


– Harry Potter y el misterio del príncipe by J.K. Rowling (author), Gemma Rovira Ortega (translator)
– Shackleton’s Boat Journey by Frank Worsley
– Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
– Two Hours: The Quest to Run the Impossible Marathon by Ed Caesar


– The Dinosaur Artist by Paige Williams
– The Lover’s Dictionary by David Levithan
– The Expatriates by Janice Y. K. Lee
– North by Scott Jurek (with Jenny Jurek)


– El Little Príncipe by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (author), Ilan Stavan (translator)
– Acceptance by Jeff Vandermeer
– The Monk of Mokha by Dave Eggers
– Preparing the Ghost by Matthew Gavin Frank


– Conversations with Friends by Sally Rooney
– The Cat’s Table by Michael Ondaantje
– The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
– The Laughing Monsters by Denis Johnson
– High Fidelity by Nick Hornby
– The Sorrow Proper by Lindsey Drager


– Age of Ambition by Evan Osnos
– Crónicas marcianas by Ray Bradbury (author), Francisco Abelenda (translator)
– The Burgess Boys by Elizabeth Strout
– Invisible Cities by Italo Calvino (author), William Weaver (translator)


– In the Heart of the Sea by Nathaniel Philbrick
– Juliet, Naked by Nick Hornby
– Five Little Pigs by Agatha Christie
– The Lost City of Z by David Grann
– A Moveable Feast by Ernest Hemingway
– The Thing Around Your Neck by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie


– When We Were Orphans by Kazuo Ishiguro
– Buzz, Sting, Bite by Anne Sverdrup-Thygeson (author), Lucy Moffatt (translator)
– Normal People by Sally Rooney
– O Pioneers! by Willa Cather


– Because Internet by Gretchen McCulloch
– Wonder Boys by Michael Chabon
– Olive, Again by Elizabeth Strout
– Cantonese Love Stories by Dung Kai-Cheung
– Labrador by Kathryn Davis
– Into the Planet by Jill Heinerth


– Arctic Dreams by Barry Lopez
– Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
– Harry Potter y las reliquias de la muerte by J.K. Rowling (author), Gemma Rovira Ortega (translator)

Shanghai: week 14 (Hong Kong)

Outside the wild boars root
Without bending a bough underfoot

Joanna Newsom

My fight-or-flight response system is heavy on the flight side. One time I was walking with my friend Danica when a big dog behind a small fence startled us with loud snarling. Instinctively, I placed Danica (maybe with a gentle shove) between the fence and me and took off running down the street. Another time, I saw a huge spider crawling on my friend Maren’s shoulder. I screamed and ran away, then screamed again from a safe distance, and wouldn’t even come close enough to tell her there was a spider prancing about on her.

The wiring of my sympathetic nervous system isn’t great for friendships (luckily I have very patient friends), or for being out in nature, because everything in nature is a little bit scary. Which is probably one reason I didn’t finish a 260-mile hike in July with my big brother, and why, when Josh and I came upon a small herd of wild pigs on a trail in Hong Kong, I reflexively ran the opposite direction, bopped off the trail and scrambled down a hill. After a roundabout go of it, we got back to where we would have come to a trailhead had we stayed on the trail, and saw hikers and joggers happily going through the group of pigs. One jogger got out her phone and went right up to a small pig to get a picture. So maybe I didn’t need to panic, after all.

Despite, and because of, the wild pig encounter, that hike in Hong Kong was one of the loveliest of my life. We started the walk from our hotel, wound our way over steep hills, on dirt, concrete, and brick paths, went up so very many stairs, and almost always had a view of green hills and bays with yachts and boats and barges. Our plan was to walk about seven miles from our hotel to a well-known trail called Dragon’s Back, and walk five miles on that trail until it ended at Big Wave Bay. Josh did the navigating using a very useful and mostly precise app called maps.me, but the distance it predicted was not quite accurate.

After eleven miles we hadn’t reached Dragon’s Back yet. We were a little hot and a little under-hydrated and hungry, when we saw stairs leading down to a mostly secluded beach. It was late afternoon and the sun on the sand and water was very inviting, and after getting in the water we sat on the stony beach and ate Lara and Kind bars and dried hawthorn fruit, which is my favorite treat I’ve found here. Shortly after that we found Dragon’s Back and saw more views and paragliders and people. We didn’t make it all the way to Big Wave, but the unnamed, unexpected cove was just as good (or even better, who the heck knows) and at the end of our hike we enjoyed a dusky walk toward our hotel, through a quiet and tiered cemetery, and into bustling Hong Kong.

The next day, we took the Green Mini Bus 40 along the coast to Stanley Bay. I really like seaside towns in the off-season. They are quiet and seem to move a little slower than normal and smell like sea salt. I assume, in addition to it being November, that the protests decreased the number of tourists. We didn’t see any of the protests (and didn’t seek any out, worrying a little about endangering our Chinese visas), and offered (impractical) mental solidarity to them, while enjoying the privilege of being carefree tourists. After a swim in Stanley Bay and a picnic with everything that a picnic should include, we hiked toward Repulse Bay.

It was a shorter hike, about five miles, and the first leg meandered past two Buddhist temples, quiet and with incense burning. We had gone about four miles when we came to some steep stairs that lead to a road that we would follow before jumping onto the last bit of trail. Josh was walking a little ahead of me and suddenly stopped short.

“That is a big mother—” he said, taking a step or two closer to get a better look. Blocking the top of the stairs were a stout wild pig and her two adolescent children. So I said, “Okay, we don’t really need to go to Repulse Bay, bye,” and turned around, because that’s what I do. Luckily, Josh was reluctant to turn back (we were tired and wanted to sit on the beach and were so close), and we waited until we saw the piggy family trot into the woods, then we continued up the stairs. I’m not sure what plans the wild pigs had, but I didn’t want to be included in them, and worried they might like to chase after and then eat a running human, so I made myself go slowly, but was very ready to fly.

And it turns out it was well worth coming close to battling the wild pigs. I swam in sunsetted water— one of the best ocean swims I’ve ever had—and read on the beach, and drank an overpriced vacation coffee and watched the sun do its thing over the hills and ships and water.

Things that I like, pt. 1

ferry-ride-and-jellyfish weekends

bullet train trips to cities with stairs and woods

Tintin store visits with the same friends on different continents

late evening flower purchases from a man on a scooter

fruit-shop cats: different colored eyes and apple-box naps

Star supermarKet! Everything you could ever need, plus the friendliest people

Shanghai: week 9

And Polo answers, “Traveling, you must realize that differences are lost: each city takes to resembling all cities, places exchange their form.”

Invisible Cities

Flying into the Tokyo Narita airport feels like flying into Kansas City, but not in a bad way. Even though I was excited to see Japan (and Asia, for that matter) for the first time as we descended toward Tokyo for a brief layover, I was sort of relieved to see the familiar bunches of trees and quilt-y farms and low-hanging clouds. It made Adventure feel a little more like adventure, which is, to be honest, more my type of outing.

Before leaving I was very eager to move to Shanghai. I felt antsy in Minneapolis and I wasn’t sure What I Wanted to Do (which disappointingly probably means how I wanted to make money), and I am very glad to have come here. I’m excited to explore other parts of China while here, and, in the future, to explore other countries. At the same time, I’m trying to figure out the value of having Experiences and Adventures versus being near people that I know and love.

To be sure, there is a lot that I like about Shanghai. There are bakeries and incredible public transportation systems and Mandarin lessons and fruit shops on every block, and there are tall, lit-up buildings, and parks with their park-cats and their denizens practicing musical instruments. There are the innumerable delightful daily interactions, like when the corner store clerk plopped two Chupa Chup lollipops in our grocery bag on October 31 with a grin and a very heartfelt: “Halloween!”

But China is also far away from a lot of people that I really like (for example, you, seeing as how you’re reading this [hi, Mom and Dad!]).

Shortly after starting my new job, I had a tremulous week of feeling wholly uncertain whether it had been the right decision to come here. I think a lot of that was getting adjusted to a great many things, including a very different type of work (so many children suddenly descended into my life). But even though the novel context magnified the emotions and now I feel much more at ease, I still want to unravel this desire to go out and about and see the world at large when that means geographically distancing myself from familiar and loving people.

I once had a college advisor tell me to abandon traveling because photographs just end up in the trashcan and to become a lawyer instead. I don’t think that there is any inherent merit in traveling over not traveling (in fact, if you don’t like traveling, it can probably be one of the most miserable things to subject yourself to), but I do like it, and it is what I want to be doing right now. It’s more than just photographs (even though I value those—I take dozens of really unfocused pictures a day); it’s about—and this is the part I can’t quite explain to myself—that shapeless genre of Experiencing New Things. I like the joyful struggle of trying to communicate in a new language and I like looking at a menu and pointing to a picture and seeing what I get, and sometimes I even like the jostle of walking among dozens of pedestrians and dodging scooters taking shortcuts across sidewalks.

But I also like, and miss, the smaller adventures of being closer to home: learning to fish and doing crossword puzzles in Broomfield; taking walks and watching fireflies in Columbia; playing pingpong and losing at chess in Lafayette; feeding chickens and eating in the fresh air in Boulder; drinking tea and talking short fiction in Denver; running along the Mississippi in Minneapolis; taking a reluctant dog for a morning walk and stumbling up the Great Sand Dunes in Alamosa.

Maybe it’s just that I’m realizing you have to choose one place to be in at a time, and that’s sort of a bummer when where I’ve chosen to be means being 6,000 miles away from quite a few places that feel like home. So, yeah, I’m glad that things don’t always look very different all the time.

Shanghai: week 4

You send your lover off to China and you wait for her to call

Counting Crows

There’s nothing like stepping out your front door in a foreign city while listening to wistful early aughts music to make your life feel like a montage: an eddy of leaves intimates the arrival of fall; a scooter loaded with three generations beeps by; the vendor with the fish-and-something-else-filled pastries wipes down her cart, all while Mr. Counting Crows’ nostalgic voice propels you down the sidewalk.

And so, in homage to the montage, here are some highlights from our first month in Shanghai:

(tl;dr: we’ve been in Shanghai for a month!)

Apartment hunting

We met our real estate agent, Tina, in a sunny alley somewhere in the Jing’an District where we had told her we wanted to live. She pulled up on a scooter and after briefly showing us two apartments that didn’t have kitchens and were out of our price range, she said not to worry, that there were plenty more apartments to see, and “Let’s go!” Which, to our delight, meant jogging after her as she assertively scootered in the street and on the sidewalk, steering with one hand and making phone calls with the other.

Jogging and scootering

In the stairway of one apartment lived the most courteous bird who greeted passersby with: “Good evening! Have you eaten?”

A most thoughtful bird

With Tina’s help translating, we signed the lease and paid the deposit on our new apartment (unfortunately with a birdless stairwell). Tina pointed out a bundle of sugarcane on the floor of the landlord’s office. She named the province it comes from and showed us how to eat it. There’s something enchanting and whimsical about eating a stalk of sugarcane with your landlord and realtor after signing a lease.

Medical examination

To turn your Z Visa into a residency permit you have to pass a medical examination. To get to the medical center you walk through a suburb of Shanghai that feels like Holland, and then enter a compound of buildings situated on very beautiful grounds.

The medical examination begins with cryptic shuffling from room-to-room for paperwork (Josh was sent to another building and our friend was sent from that building to the building we had started out in) and then standing in line to pay an undetermined amount, which ranges, we are told, from 0 to 750 RMB. Everyone in front of me was asked to pay 461 RMB (about 65 USD) and when I got up to the window I gave the woman five pink 100 RMB notes, which she promptly handed back to me along with the paperwork I needed to proceed. Meanwhile, in the other building, Josh was asked to pay the 461 RMB.

The examination then includes being issued a very comfortable robe, which felt much more like a spa garment than anything you’d find in a hospital.

Luxury robe

The actual check-up is an impressive feat of efficiently administered medical tests on hordes of mystified foreigners, most with no Chinese, all with varying degrees of English, communicating with medical professionals who have in turn their own varieties of English. The level of communication in lingua franca English is remarkable here, and I feel very fortunate that it happens to be my native language.

All of us robed and bewildered foreigners, passports and paperwork clutched in our hands, were then cycled through the medical tests in a mysterious but organized way. Josh and I, for example, never saw each other once in the maze of hallways and rooms, but we had all the same tests done and finished at the same time.  With very little linguistic communication, we received an EKG, chest X-ray, ultrasound, had our blood drawn and our eyesight tested, and had our height, weight, and blood pressure taken.

Everything felt sanitary enough and all the medical personnel were polite, but if you wanted to you could imagine it all feeling very much like a YA dystopian novel: foreigners in matching robes on a grim rainy day roaming grim clinical hallways, being shuffled from medical test to medical test with no way of knowing what to expect next.

Or, as Josh put it, it felt like there was a chance we had just signed up for the army.

Sites, food & everything else

Each day is filled with details specific to being in a new place. Everything is novel.  Every day Josh and I walk on a new street, see a new site (a small boy sitting on the back of a scooter while holding a cat that is tucked into a backpack and has a cone around its face!), try a new food, mispronounce a new word. To top off the montage, here are a few more photographs from the past month:

Touristing at the Oriental Pearl
Josh looking fly while eating a cucumber
My favorite food
There’s nothing that a scooter can’t carry
Houseplant shopping
The Bund and a barge

The best part of all this is that I’m here in China, experiencing all these adventures, with my specialsomeone, so I don’t even have to wait for him to call.